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Awkward Bathroom Talk

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Baldoraxx

Internalizing Master Of Casual
Basically tell use your most awkward talk with a co-worker or complete stranger in the bathroom....

This topic came to mind when a co-worker walked past me in the bathroom as I was doing my business and asks: "Do you think there are yellow lightsabers in Star Wars?" I reply awkwardly "ummmm probably" (because we were in the bathroom and I don't want people talking to me when I am unloading) he then says: "Well, that's what I was thinking about"

Like, seriously.....I am so confused.
 
Said "hello, gotta squeeze in here." to some guy, just to acknowledge his existence at the no barrier pisser next to me at the bar.
Apparently in crazy people talk this means were blood brothers...
He went on for a long, long, long time about his life, his family, his crazy daughter fucking some Army guy, and what have you.

He was so hell bent on involving me in his life that my awkward nods and smiles apparently indicated we were not just blood brothers, we are now genuine family and I should go to Alaska and meet his daughter and the Army guy she likes to fuck. (his words exactly)

To this day I have no idea if he thought that Army guy fucking his daughter was special forces, or he was, or if we were still stuck in candy land for crazies.
He kept talking to me after I went through 4, 4! good exit conversation excuses shook his hand (thank [deity of choice] he ran water over his hands after I nodded to the sink and left the water running) not once, not twice, but three times. On the fourth time I just walked out the bar and he gave me a dirty look like I shunned him.
*If you haven't guessed by now he followed me around a while after the piss.

Screw you jerkoff....
I was kinder than half the human race and stuck around longer than most loyal dogs would. Who cares if I'm wearing a USMC sweater and your daughter fucks a self-inflated Army guy. We pissed next to each other, That Was IT!

/sigh
 
At my former working place one of my responsibilities was checking the mail. Our cardboard discarding place was right in front of the woman toilet. While I was cutting and folding the cardboard into small pieces, my hot french coworker (married, 2 kids) told me to come into the toilet.

So I went in and luckily (or sadly) she only wanted to show me that the tap was broken and I should call the janitor to fix it.
You can guess how awkward (me being 19) it was.
 
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