It's like my mind knows.. every year it knows. Getting the call from my mother to turn on the TV, ignoring the fire engines because it was normal for where I lived, looking out the window to confirm what I saw on the television when I turned it on, waiting for the pot head fuck ups to get baked before leaving the apartment/dorm toward to promenade, seeing droves and droves of "white people" racing the other way over the bridge, unable to see infront of us anymore, hearing, "It fell" all around us, moving to a new place, alone without the dipshits I lived with to get a better view, the sounds of metal cracking, the visual of beams flying upward as they fell down, not sure how to respond, not sure what to think, cried, didn't cry, walked back, watched it on the TV for 3 days... The whole city got a case of ptsd that day, we just didn't know it. I refuse to turn on the TV today, I refuse to listen to the news. I have relived it many times since that day, and now I just look at the freedom tower from my window, thankful and understanding. But why I need to see the damn replay over and over for the shock value is beyond me. SO I won't. I will just remember. In my own way.