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The "Girl" Gamer: On The Other Side

tr1age said:
These two statements contradict one another and actually help to prove the point that small or large, this will happen.
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What I meant was the "gamer girl" is not a novelty anymore to attract "that much attention" nowadays. Incidents sure will happen.
tr1age said:
However, if you are saying you do not believe that girls will not use the gaming culture and their female status to progress or spearhead themselves, which is actually a smaller part of this article...

Ex porn star turned "cosplayer":
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Oh no as long as men want boobs some females will use it to their advantage.

The cosplayer situation is different though. not personal, like, well your Sarah character. Oh and I hate peach "Sorry Mario princess is in another castle" not once not twice.. fuck you peach!

Having read the second chapter I'm just "wow". So much "fuss" without you actively using your female status.. That UO community looks just so bad.
 
While reading this I was reminded of my own experiences in game. I have no idea how many times I had said "No, I wan't to get it myself". Though, the ones that were offering me the gifts were my rl friends, who knew I was a girl. Wow, shit. Looking back, it's true. If people didn't know I was a girl I'd get ignored. I remember that a LOT of the members of my old guild thought I was a guy. I thought that was cool, so never really corrected anyone unless they asked. I've always wanted to be just one of the guys, so I loved it when people couldn't tell. Plus I liked being all mysterious. XD

It wasn't until a get together we had that people actually saw me in person. The greetings in that party were the same for all the guys, "So which character are you?", or "<insert username here>, right?". For me they either wouldn't ask, or if they did it would be things like, "Do you play?", or "You don't play at all, right?". I'd answer with my username, and at the time since I wasn't max level a lot of them were just shaking their head. They couldn't remember. The thing is that after the party I noticed that more people in the guild were talking to me. I only thought it was because we had finally met in real life, and they were just being friendly. I never really figured it had anything to do with me being a girl. Who knows, maybe some were just being genuinely nice.

Thankfully I never had so many people demanding attention like that, mostly cause when I'm doing something I just want to get it done, and involving others would just slow down my process. I guess me having a male avatar also helped. I remember, once I started raids, people being surprised when I got on vent. I played a male undead, while my bf at the time played a female undead. It was funny to hear people's reactions when they found out the truth. I was never taken seriously in that guild. I didn't put up much of a fight though cause I had Full Sail to worry about.

This also reminds me of a girl I had met at that school. This is in 2010 mind you. She did everything in her power to let others know that she was a girl that played games. I don't like to throw around "gamer" since everyone seems to have a different definition for the term. It just got to the point where a lot of people just found her attitude toward that annoying. She was always in your face about it, without having asked. "Look at me, I'm a girl gamer. Love me!"

Who cares what gender you are? It shouldn't matter.
 
This is pretty incredible man haha. I've done little micro versions of this in the past and always wanted to go a bit further but could never totally commit to the experiment. Definitely looking forward to the next chapters. I do feel that an isolated community like this may show this to a greater extreme, but I believe if you did the same experiment in WoW there's a good chance that you would see similarities on a smaller scale. Women and men get treated differently, there's no way around that. As long as men still have a penis and women still have a vagina there will always be some level of disconnect between the two.
 
Great article.

Had this experience a few times because i play only female characters as they seem to have better customization (a lot male toons seem to have huge necks with all these dragonball z hair styles or comb overs lol) and i use the name Herase which is quite a feminine sounding name. In some games i use to get messages like "Need help babez?" or "Ill give you stuff if you be my gf" it was crazy, its like men lose all control when they think your a girl.

Also had experience when meeting gaming girls, was playing S4 league once. A guy asked someone if they were a girl and she said yes, at that point every guy seem to lose their mind, offering to play with her, asking to add her and she was soaking it up and responding in this most god awful way, pushing to see what see could get out of this. Personally i lose respect for girls who go out of their way to do this, i know she was asked but she could have still acted abit more humble about it. also i feel it ruins the gaming experience because if you ever talk to them you feel there going ask you to bow and attended to their every need and feels so cringy when guys act like tools trying to impress them.

The other experience i had, which was my first ever positive encounter was in wow. Joined a guild to start raiding, played with them for about a week then started jumping on vent fro raids, where i realized the guild leader was a female. This shocked me because for a week i just chatted casually with her making jokes and stuff in Gchat, so it was a complete different experience from what i usually get when meeting girl gamers who normally blurt out there girls any chance they get, but that wasn't what made me the love the guild and the people in it. Found out a few days later that her partner plays and she was also a female. I only found this out because she made a noise on vent for the first time. Me and the guild leaders partner became good mates after a while, also because we where the duo shaman healers of doom lol, and i found out there were at least 3 other females in the guild as well, which i thought was awesome because no one in the guild was treated differently, the was no differentiation between male or female. It made the gaming experience much better because no one was trying to suck up to the girls in the guild and none of the girls were throwing the "gamer girl" title around. All it was was gamers playing games together and that's how it should be. :)
 
dainjre said:
Even actual girl gamers sometimes act like fools.

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Off topic: This is the most ridiculous video I have ever seen.

On Topic: This article was a good read, it got a bit weird at times and for a while I wasn't sure what exactly the "goal" of the experiment was, but eventually I figured it out and WOW. I've never really been one to separate "girl gamers" from "guy gamers", usually i'm just after "friends" and generally I try to ostracize myself from the gaming "community" (if you can call it that) due to the fact that I usually only play with my girlfriend and close friends.

Just gonna throw this out there... a few of those John Doe's threw off that weird stalker vibe. Asking for photos is, in my opinion, not a cool thing to do unless you're on a dating site. Even then, I always assumed proper etiquette was to wait until said person was comfortable enough to freely give out personal shit. Different strokes I guess, but damn does that seem weird to me. Did any of these guys get dangerously creepy?
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I do agree that it CAN go both ways. I've seen myself. It's clearly seen in the Sexism is not sexy video as well. I don't agree with it not being shocking though, at least for me. Reading the article just made me think on how I act toward others and what I SHOULD be doing.
 
Evilcat said:
In an even 50/50 setting wile this stuff still goes down it happens on a much smaller scale and goes both ways.
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Isn't part of the point that the setting is NOT 50/50 nor does it stand to be that way for some time.
 
hmmmm... reminds me of "gold diggers" in wow... and all the guild dramas I've seen or heard of... (Guild leader's GF roll priority bullshit n'stuff) makes me real sad that the human conditioning presents itself in such way, honestly I've never had to experience something like that before and I'm very thankful for it. I've had many MANY female guildies in the past and MOST of them were amazing players and very cool to hang with and even tho I'd go out of my way to help them if they needed it I have done the same for just about anyone.

In this comunity we have plenty of females too! and while playing GW2 we had a TON of them, any drama? nope, not that I can recall at least. Favoritisms? nyet. Just the way I like it too.

BTW Tristan at the end of the experiment how did you feel? I think that if I went through all that I'd die just a little inside knowing how some people would crawl through mud for a little attention even if only digital... so sad.

In introspection I pity emotional starvation.
 
In my original wow guild we had a girl come in and use her womanly charms to get stuff. She ended up dating the GM in real life and when he stopped playing he gave her the guild. She still has it today as far as I know. I remember her flirting with me a lot and I was having none of it.
 
I actually had a woman Linkshell leader (FFXI), and I stress WOMAN not girl. She was the coolest lady EVER, we did fish a LOT on the ferry overnight, she was very motherly tho... awesome times, awesome times.
 
This article is so awesome I have loved reading it. It's so messed up how much drama you caused and how much bloody stuff you got. Well done on the commitment to this even getting a voice thing..crazy!
 
I absolutely LOVE this article series. That was a really brave thing for you to do, especially the reveal at the end. Non-gamers sometimes have a hard time understanding that we form strong friendships with the people that we play with, so it must have been rough to be undercover in the spirit of research. Thankfully it sounds like everything worked out in the end. Kudos!

I primarily play female avatars and have experienced the whole "hey babe" in /whisper chat thing. Fortunately for me, I just reply "dude, I'm gay" and they **usually** back off :)
 
I like the whole thing more now that I've read all the parts. It was definitely an interesting story. I found myself not able to relate to or understand a lot of it, most likely because I'm not as immersed in the gamer culture. My whole time with MMO's, I've played with friends and only joined guilds that I found to be mature and respectful. Of course, I ran into idiots in random dungeons, but I didn't have to deal with them all the time and could safely ignore them. It's a side to gaming that I really don't want to be a part of, and part of me wants to believe that people really can't be that immature.

Anyway, thanks for the trip; it was a fun ride.
 
Keleynal said:
My whole time with MMO's, I've played with friends and only joined guilds that I found to be mature and respectful. Of course, I ran into idiots in random dungeons, but I didn't have to deal with them all the time and could safely ignore them. It's a side to gaming that I really don't want to be a part of
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You are welcome, but I am going to go off topic two seconds here... I really dislike the idea that "MMO's" cater such a secluded feel to them these days. We are no longer playing online we are playing pockets. We are no longer looking forward to a living breathing world, but a scripted environment for our closest friends to marvel at with us instead of us marveling at what we do together and accomplish/build/create.

The fact that you have never experienced this makes me sad. It may, in this article be a bit subjective... but in general it is the idea that this COULD happen, the world is FILLED with people, and You MEET new people every day in that game, that makes it exciting, fun, and new. Even if there is nothing "new" to do.

I really with more of you would try this game. Regardless of liking the "graphics" you would learn a lot about what it feels like to be in a TRUE living MMO.
 
I've definitely made friends in game, but I don't view MMOs as primarily social things. For me, it's primarily about the game itself, and if having thousands of real people playing at once makes it a better game, I'm all for it. In other words, I don't play to meet people; I just happen to meet people when I play.
 
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